| Author |
Message |
 Topic: The verbal joke thread |
sabalasa
Replies: 23
Views: 5559
|
 Forum: Jokes, Stories, Quotes, Web games, Cool Links Posted: Sat, 17th Dec 2011 13:20 Subject: The verbal joke thread |
Stevie Wonder goes to a pub with his seeing dog. He orders 6 beers, takes a sip and starts swirling his dog around like a lasso holding the dog from his tail.
"What the hell are you doing!" screams ... |
| Topic: The verbal joke thread |
sabalasa
Replies: 23
Views: 5559
|
Forum: Jokes, Stories, Quotes, Web games, Cool Links Posted: Sat, 17th Dec 2011 13:16 Subject: The verbal joke thread |
Blonde Logic:
January - Took new scarf back to store because it was too tight.
February - Fired from pharmacy job for failing to print labels....."duh".....bottles won't fit in typewriter!!!
... |
| Topic: The verbal joke thread |
sabalasa
Replies: 23
Views: 5559
|
Forum: Jokes, Stories, Quotes, Web games, Cool Links Posted: Sat, 17th Dec 2011 12:53 Subject: The verbal joke thread |
2 junkies in court.
Judge: " I will not put you in prison if you can talk people away from drugs. You have 2 days, then you report back to me."
After 2 days the junkies are back.
Judge: "How did ... |
| Topic: The verbal joke thread |
sabalasa
Replies: 23
Views: 5559
|
Forum: Jokes, Stories, Quotes, Web games, Cool Links Posted: Sat, 17th Dec 2011 12:42 Subject: The verbal joke thread |
let's bump up this thread again 
3 surgeons are discussing their work.
Surgeon 1: "I like to work with accountants. Their internal organs are always numbered."
Surgeon 2: "I like librarians mor ... |
| Topic: The verbal joke thread |
sabalasa
Replies: 23
Views: 5559
|
Forum: Jokes, Stories, Quotes, Web games, Cool Links Posted: Tue, 6th Dec 2011 22:57 Subject: The verbal joke thread |
hilarious link for a change. All IPhone users know the pain 
http://damnyouautocorrect.com/13603/the-25-funniest-autocorrects-of-dyacs-first-year/
happy COCKSLAPPIN' |
| Topic: The verbal joke thread |
sabalasa
Replies: 23
Views: 5559
|
Forum: Jokes, Stories, Quotes, Web games, Cool Links Posted: Tue, 6th Dec 2011 11:44 Subject: The verbal joke thread |
WARNING: Politically incorrect one!
In US.
Man is driving on the highway and suddenly he sees a police car in his back mirror with flashlights on.
"I have my driving licence, I've not been drin ... |
| Topic: The verbal joke thread |
sabalasa
Replies: 23
Views: 5559
|
Forum: Jokes, Stories, Quotes, Web games, Cool Links Posted: Tue, 6th Dec 2011 07:05 Subject: The verbal joke thread |
 |
| Topic: Life before the internet... |
sabalasa
Replies: 26
Views: 2435
|
Forum: General chatter Posted: Mon, 5th Dec 2011 21:42 Subject: Life before the internet... |
if I sometimes go through my notes from the classes I had...I can still point out in the notes the times I wasn't present
The material is full of "holes" were I was present and very detailed where ... |
| Topic: Life before the internet... |
sabalasa
Replies: 26
Views: 2435
|
Forum: General chatter Posted: Mon, 5th Dec 2011 21:33 Subject: Life before the internet... |
how we did it?
We sent in teh girls
They were quite pedantic in writing down what the professor said in the classes. And they handwriting was also very readable 
As we did not have even ... |
| Topic: The verbal joke thread |
sabalasa
Replies: 23
Views: 5559
|
Forum: Jokes, Stories, Quotes, Web games, Cool Links Posted: Mon, 5th Dec 2011 17:29 Subject: 2 junikes |
2 junkies are in the cinema. The lights start to dim.
"You see how the lights fade away?" asks the first one.
"I know how it is done!" replies the other
"How?"
"They have a man up there who is vee ... |
| Topic: The verbal joke thread |
sabalasa
Replies: 23
Views: 5559
|
Forum: Jokes, Stories, Quotes, Web games, Cool Links Posted: Mon, 5th Dec 2011 09:28 Subject: The verbal joke thread |
Men be cautious what you say to your wives...
Wife: "What would you do if I die? Would you marry again?"
Husband: "Definitely not!"
Wife: "Why? You don't like to be married?"
Husband: "Of course ... |
| Topic: 2 friends |
sabalasa
Replies: 5
Views: 784
|
Forum: Jokes, Stories, Quotes, Web games, Cool Links Posted: Mon, 5th Dec 2011 09:16 Subject: 2 friends |
I will use the thread that iconized created.
http://www.nfohump.com/forum/viewtopic.php?t=73294 |
| Topic: The verbal joke thread |
sabalasa
Replies: 23
Views: 5559
|
Forum: Jokes, Stories, Quotes, Web games, Cool Links Posted: Mon, 5th Dec 2011 09:10 Subject: The verbal joke thread |
I did not get it because i'm not Duch or Belgian
I will use this thread for my every day treats to you
-----
Aggitated wife: "How come you come home a 4 o'clock in the night!?! I'm speech ... |
| Topic: Baby pills |
sabalasa
Replies: 0
Views: 358
|
Forum: Jokes, Stories, Quotes, Web games, Cool Links Posted: Mon, 5th Dec 2011 07:20 Subject: Baby pills |
| a woman mixed up her baby pills and antidepressants. Now she has 16 children and she doesn't give a shit. |
| Topic: Optimist and pessimist |
sabalasa
Replies: 2
Views: 512
|
Forum: Jokes, Stories, Quotes, Web games, Cool Links Posted: Mon, 5th Dec 2011 07:17 Subject: Optimist and pessimist |
| when optimist and pessimist go to the graveyard then it is factually known that pessimist sees crosses but optimist pluses. |
| Topic: 2 friends |
sabalasa
Replies: 5
Views: 784
|
Forum: Jokes, Stories, Quotes, Web games, Cool Links Posted: Mon, 5th Dec 2011 07:12 Subject: 2 friends |
well thanks guys!
I thought after browsing this section that there are loads of cool links and web games but very few jokes. So I decided to share the best ones I know with you
Every day at l ... |
| Topic: In Court... |
sabalasa
Replies: 5
Views: 716
|
Forum: Jokes, Stories, Quotes, Web games, Cool Links Posted: Sun, 4th Dec 2011 22:44 Subject: In Court... |
Allegedly true stories:
-----
ATTORNEY: Are you sexually active?
WITNESS: No, I just lie there.
-----
ATTORNEY: Now doctor, isn't it true that when a person dies in his sleep, he doesn't kn ... |
| Topic: Dirty mind |
sabalasa
Replies: 0
Views: 394
|
Forum: Jokes, Stories, Quotes, Web games, Cool Links Posted: Sun, 4th Dec 2011 22:38 Subject: Dirty mind |
How fast can you guess these words?
1) BOO_S
2) _ _NDOM
3) F_ _K
4) P_N_S
5) PU_S_
6) S_X
Answers: 1) books 2) random 3) fork 4) pants 5) pulse 6) six
You dirty minded bastard!!! : ... |
| Topic: Wisdom |
sabalasa
Replies: 3
Views: 499
|
Forum: Jokes, Stories, Quotes, Web games, Cool Links Posted: Sun, 4th Dec 2011 22:26 Subject: Wisdom |
| A world without women would be a pain in the ass! |
| Topic: Marriage |
sabalasa
Replies: 1
Views: 426
|
Forum: Jokes, Stories, Quotes, Web games, Cool Links Posted: Sun, 4th Dec 2011 22:05 Subject: Marriage |
FOR SALE!
Complete set of Encyclopedia Britannica.
45 volumes. Excellent condition.
$1000 or best offer.
No longer needed.
Got married last weekend.
WIFE KNOWS FUCKING EVERYTHING! |
| Topic: Education |
sabalasa
Replies: 3
Views: 556
|
Forum: Jokes, Stories, Quotes, Web games, Cool Links Posted: Sun, 4th Dec 2011 21:53 Subject: Education |
Teacher asks her students to write a lengthy paper in English class. A boy from the back row says: " You know, I'm sooooooo tired from the sexual intercourse I had last night. I cannot write a word"
... |
| Topic: 2 friends |
sabalasa
Replies: 5
Views: 784
|
Forum: Jokes, Stories, Quotes, Web games, Cool Links Posted: Sun, 4th Dec 2011 21:42 Subject: 2 friends |
2 friends meet. One has a black eye.
"What happened?"
"Ah, I had a fight with John"
"But you are stronger than John?"
"Well yes, but he had a knife..."
"And you?"
"I had John wife's tit in my ha ... |
| Topic: Miscommunication |
sabalasa
Replies: 5
Views: 831
|
Forum: Jokes, Stories, Quotes, Web games, Cool Links Posted: Sun, 4th Dec 2011 21:30 Subject: Miscommunication |
What a Woman Says:
"This place is a mess! C'mon,
You and I need to clean up.
Your stuff is lying on the floor,
and if we don't do laundry right now
you'll have no clothes to wear."
What ... |
| Topic: Pick up line for men that works... |
sabalasa
Replies: 0
Views: 377
|
Forum: Jokes, Stories, Quotes, Web games, Cool Links Posted: Sun, 4th Dec 2011 21:15 Subject: Pick up line for men that works... |
in the club walk straight to a girl you like and ask "Let's go to my place, have sex and drink some coffee!".
If the girl stares at you full of surprise add quickly: "...or you don't drink coffee?" |
| Topic: Caution... |
sabalasa
Replies: 0
Views: 357
|
Forum: Jokes, Stories, Quotes, Web games, Cool Links Posted: Sun, 4th Dec 2011 20:29 Subject: Caution... |
| Yesterday my boss arranged our office's championships in tetris. The top 3 got fired instantly... |
| Topic: Dear father... |
sabalasa
Replies: 4
Views: 615
|
Forum: Jokes, Stories, Quotes, Web games, Cool Links Posted: Sun, 4th Dec 2011 20:18 Subject: Dear father... |
Dear father,
I'm dong well in Berlin. Good teachers, great classmates and all in all very nice people. But I have a problem. I'm a little bit ashamed to drive to school in my golden ferrari because ... |
| Topic: How I fired my assistant... |
sabalasa
Replies: 2
Views: 543
|
Forum: Jokes, Stories, Quotes, Web games, Cool Links Posted: Sun, 4th Dec 2011 20:02 Subject: How I fired my assistant... |
| It was on my birthday. I wasn't feeling enthusiastic when I woke up. On my way downstairs to have my breakfast and coffee I thought that my wife will definitely wish me happy birthday and she obviousl ... |
| Topic: Can happen... |
sabalasa
Replies: 3
Views: 620
|
Forum: Jokes, Stories, Quotes, Web games, Cool Links Posted: Sun, 4th Dec 2011 19:29 Subject: Can happen... |
| fixed |
| Topic: Can happen... |
sabalasa
Replies: 3
Views: 620
|
Forum: Jokes, Stories, Quotes, Web games, Cool Links Posted: Sat, 3rd Dec 2011 10:10 Subject: Can happen... |
| A young man at the pharmacy: "Hi. I'm going to visit my girlfriend tonight and I need condoms. She also has a younger sister and the mother looks also very ok. Please give me 3 packages just in case." ... |
| Topic: Magic |
sabalasa
Replies: 5
Views: 645
|
Forum: Jokes, Stories, Quotes, Web games, Cool Links Posted: Fri, 2nd Dec 2011 20:30 Subject: Magic |
David Copperield is about to cross borders. In the customs the official is checking his gear etc. and it takes quite a while. David becomes agitated and says to the official: "Do you know who I am?"
... |
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