What was the worst sexual experience you had?
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TSR69
Banned



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Location: Republic of the Seven United Provinces
PostPosted: Tue, 10th Aug 2010 19:01    Post subject: What was the worst sexual experience you had?
Bit inspired by the meteor story, I was thinking about my latest standing laid experience in a pub in the men's toilet.
I was drunk like hell and it took me at least 2 weeks to remember enough to realise I had unprotected sex in a toilet in a pub.
This woman is like 50 and from Germany, she is very friendly and a nice person and for her age she looks good.
But when I am drunk like that I can't perform so after several mins I put my pieces back into my trousers and said to her: "I am too drunk to do this."
Maybe the worst part of this was the fact that the next day I couldn't even remember I had sex.
Normally you feel good about yourself after a job Neutral
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Ragedoctor




Posts: 2184
Location: (dot)NL
PostPosted: Tue, 10th Aug 2010 19:09    Post subject:
>50

Oh dear
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M4trix




Posts: 9258
Location: Croatia, Adriatic coast (I can see ixi from here)
PostPosted: Tue, 10th Aug 2010 19:16    Post subject:
Ragedoctor wrote:
>50

Oh dear


So what? He's a MILF hunter. At least they have plenty of experience and you can always learn something new! Very Happy

Edit: iconized, too much booze + sex = bad combination! Wink


Made in China is like a box of chocolates. You never know what you're gonna get.
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Werelds
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PostPosted: Tue, 10th Aug 2010 20:43    Post subject:
Ouwe fiets he iconized Wink
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Nalo
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PostPosted: Tue, 10th Aug 2010 20:58    Post subject:
⁢⁢


Last edited by Nalo on Wed, 3rd Jul 2024 07:03; edited 2 times in total
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SilverBlue




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PostPosted: Wed, 11th Aug 2010 01:44    Post subject:
Once when I was with a chick that had a clit piercing, the piercing made my bits bleed. Sad
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PumpAction
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PostPosted: Wed, 11th Aug 2010 01:52    Post subject:
Well iconized isn't the youngest either, why shouldn't he trying baning a 50yr old?

BUT AT LEAST SUCCEED MAN...


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Lathieza




Posts: 7146
Location: NL
PostPosted: Wed, 11th Aug 2010 02:56    Post subject:
M4trix wrote:
Ragedoctor wrote:
>50

Oh dear


So what? He's a MILF hunter. At least they have plenty of experience and you can always learn something new! Very Happy

Edit: iconized, too much booze + sex = bad combination! Wink


*GILF hunter Laughing


Empty again Sad
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batmota
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PostPosted: Wed, 11th Aug 2010 03:00    Post subject:
It was with inatan and ixigia. We made a threesome.
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kumkss




Posts: 4834
Location: Chile
PostPosted: Wed, 11th Aug 2010 04:13    Post subject:
hi tombata! Laughing

well... many years ago, i was with a girl and after some intercourse, i've noticed she had some shit in her ass. it was disgusting. for real. Razz
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Ankh




Posts: 23342
Location: Trelleborg
PostPosted: Wed, 11th Aug 2010 06:19    Post subject:
kumkss wrote:
hi tombata! Laughing

well... many years ago, i was with a girl and after some intercourse, i've noticed she had some shit in her ass. it was disgusting. for real. Razz


Atleast it was close to where it's supposed to be...be glad it wasnt around her mouth


shitloads of new stuff in my pc. Cant keep track of it all.
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bringiton




Posts: 3712

PostPosted: Wed, 11th Aug 2010 07:28    Post subject:
Ankh wrote:
kumkss wrote:
hi tombata! Laughing

well... many years ago, i was with a girl and after some intercourse, i've noticed she had some shit in her ass. it was disgusting. for real. Razz


Atleast it was close to where it's supposed to be...be glad it wasnt around her mouth
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-=Cartoon=-
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PostPosted: Wed, 11th Aug 2010 07:46    Post subject:
When they wake up in the middle of it
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M4trix




Posts: 9258
Location: Croatia, Adriatic coast (I can see ixi from here)
PostPosted: Wed, 11th Aug 2010 10:29    Post subject:
kumkss wrote:
hi tombata! Laughing

well... many years ago, i was with a girl and after some intercourse, i've noticed she had some shit in her ass. it was disgusting. for real. Razz


So what did you expected? Flowers in her ass? Just don't plug it in there! Very Happy


Made in China is like a box of chocolates. You never know what you're gonna get.
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LeoNatan
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PostPosted: Wed, 11th Aug 2010 10:35    Post subject:
M4trix wrote:
So what did you expected? Flowers in her ass?

How about some hygiene? Or everyone you go to bed with have shit smeared all over? Laughing
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M4trix




Posts: 9258
Location: Croatia, Adriatic coast (I can see ixi from here)
PostPosted: Wed, 11th Aug 2010 10:48    Post subject:
iNatan wrote:
M4trix wrote:
So what did you expected? Flowers in her ass?

How about some hygiene? Or everyone you go to bed with have shit smeared all over? Laughing


Well, he said...in the ass, not...around the ass! Yes, hygiene is the most important thing but you can't simply use a plunger to remove the crap from the ermm...cough...colon! Very Happy Very Happy Very Happy



Made in China is like a box of chocolates. You never know what you're gonna get.


Last edited by M4trix on Wed, 11th Aug 2010 10:54; edited 1 time in total
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LeoNatan
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PostPosted: Wed, 11th Aug 2010 10:51    Post subject:
Ahaha well I'm sure he wasn't looking inside the anus with a magnifying glass. Laughing
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Unauthorized




Posts: 2070
Location: Sweden
PostPosted: Wed, 11th Aug 2010 10:56    Post subject:
I had a experience like that once, I think it may be from the heavy fucking that the small bits just inside gets pushed out Laughing

Cause I didn't notice it the first time I fucked her from behind that time. It was only after some random positions and then back to Doggy that the small shit was discovered smeared over her butt cheek!


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M4trix




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Location: Croatia, Adriatic coast (I can see ixi from here)
PostPosted: Wed, 11th Aug 2010 11:00    Post subject:
Unauthorized wrote:
the small shit was discovered smeared over her butt cheek!


Cool Face


Made in China is like a box of chocolates. You never know what you're gonna get.
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moosenoodles




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PostPosted: Wed, 11th Aug 2010 11:00    Post subject:
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Unauthorized




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PostPosted: Wed, 11th Aug 2010 11:14    Post subject:
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RMFX




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PostPosted: Wed, 11th Aug 2010 11:19    Post subject:
LOL!
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MirkoOdora




Posts: 1036

PostPosted: Wed, 11th Aug 2010 15:37    Post subject:
Once when I was 16 or so I was eating a chick and I scrapped the lower hole (which wasn't clean) with my nose. It started to stink pretty bad but I acted like nothing happened. She also tried to act like she wasn't embarrassed.

It all went well in the end. I came. Not sure about her.

I'm guessing all bad sexual experience go something like this ^^. Very Happy


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Ankh




Posts: 23342
Location: Trelleborg
PostPosted: Wed, 11th Aug 2010 16:32    Post subject:
A mate of mine woke up at a festival with his pants down his ankles and a tent pole up his arse Razz


shitloads of new stuff in my pc. Cant keep track of it all.
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Gomp




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Location: Norway
PostPosted: Wed, 11th Aug 2010 17:23    Post subject:
Ankh wrote:
A mate of mine woke up at a festival with his pants down his ankles and a tent pole up his arse Razz


Outch, that got to hurt Laughing
Has he laid back on the booze after that happened?
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FireMaster




Posts: 13482
Location: I do not belong
PostPosted: Wed, 11th Aug 2010 17:36    Post subject:
iNatan shat on my dick once Sad only decent part is when ixiga licked & sucked it all off
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ixigia
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PostPosted: Wed, 11th Aug 2010 17:44    Post subject:
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Lathieza




Posts: 7146
Location: NL
PostPosted: Wed, 11th Aug 2010 18:01    Post subject:
Ankh wrote:
A mate of mine woke up at a festival with his pants down his ankles and a tent pole up his arse Razz


Don't they allways say it happened to a "friend" ?? Razz


Empty again Sad
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-=Cartoon=-
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PostPosted: Wed, 11th Aug 2010 18:06    Post subject:
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pistolshrimp
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PostPosted: Wed, 11th Aug 2010 18:48    Post subject:
Oh the good old days when women took a shit first, then bathed! You poor bastards. Razz
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