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 Posted: Tue, 1st Feb 2005 17:53 Post subject: Alexander (2004) *DVDSCREENER* PLUS |
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anyone seen it yet.
hows the quality of the picture and the sound?
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copywrong
Posts: 707
Location: Here today, gone tomorrow...
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| Posted: Wed, 2nd Feb 2005 16:23 Post subject: |
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Had a look at the dvdr screener about a week ago and it was really good. 5.1DD sound and anamorphic video. No subs and no B/W. Only a small banner once in a while saying: For you consideration. Great release.
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| Posted: Wed, 2nd Feb 2005 17:15 Post subject: |
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OMG alexander sucks such massive cock (literally), one of the most disappointing films ever.
There is only one reason to watch this film, you get to see rosario dawson's tits. Which are actually rather fantastic.
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razor1394
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Posts: 3571
Location: Sweden
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| Posted: Wed, 2nd Feb 2005 17:32 Post subject: |
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| AnimalMother wrote: | OMG alexander sucks such massive cock (literally), one of the most disappointing films ever.
There is only one reason to watch this film, you get to see rosario dawson's tits. Which are actually rather fantastic. |
I agree. I haven't seen it myself but everyone who has says it sucks donkey balls. People need to stop watching movies after watching the "cool" trailers. That's what tricked watchers viewing this and maybe the background.
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copywrong
Posts: 707
Location: Here today, gone tomorrow...
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| Posted: Wed, 2nd Feb 2005 19:31 Post subject: |
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Agreed, movie was crap but Dawson's tits were spectacular. Well worth a watch.
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| Posted: Wed, 2nd Feb 2005 19:50 Post subject: |
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One of the worst aspects of the film was that half of it was gays either flirting with or dancing in front of colin farrell. He was utter shit too, he still has his irish accent ffs!
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nouseforaname
Über-VIP Member
Posts: 21306
Location: Toronto, Canada
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copywrong
Posts: 707
Location: Here today, gone tomorrow...
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fisk
Posts: 9145
Location: Von Oben
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| Posted: Wed, 2nd Feb 2005 23:32 Post subject: |
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| AnimalMother wrote: | | One of the worst aspects of the film was that half of it was gays either flirting with or dancing in front of colin farrell. He was utter shit too, he still has his irish accent ffs! |
Not that I like the movie, but what did you expect? Him speaking fluent macedonic or greek? Having a greek accent in english doesn't create believability imho... Jolie sounded like a slavic moron from a B-vampire movie.
Yes, yes I'm back.
Somewhat.
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| Posted: Wed, 2nd Feb 2005 23:58 Post subject: |
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| fisk wrote: | | AnimalMother wrote: | | One of the worst aspects of the film was that half of it was gays either flirting with or dancing in front of colin farrell. He was utter shit too, he still has his irish accent ffs! |
Not that I like the movie, but what did you expect? Him speaking fluent macedonic or greek? Having a greek accent in english doesn't create believability imho... Jolie sounded like a slavic moron from a B-vampire movie. |
I agree about jolie, but he could have at least made an effort. Not that it would have improved the movie much, it was just an example.
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fisk
Posts: 9145
Location: Von Oben
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| Posted: Thu, 3rd Feb 2005 00:10 Post subject: |
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If he makes an effort he looks as if he's about to shit his pants, how about we simply pension this gaylord model?
Yes, yes I'm back.
Somewhat.
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| Posted: Thu, 3rd Feb 2005 19:20 Post subject: |
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Hmmm...someone post a clip of these tits.
Im a cockfag
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| Posted: Sun, 6th Feb 2005 22:18 Post subject: |
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| AnimalMother wrote: | | One of the worst aspects of the film was that half of it was gays either flirting with or dancing in front of colin farrell. He was utter shit too, he still has his irish accent ffs! |
saw the movie yesterday and if you would count the gay stuff you would maybe come at 5 minutes. its not like they do anything. they give a kiss and they film it from really far away so luckely we dont see it very good. i didnt notice a irish accent but thats propably cause i dont care
the first big fighting scene reminded me of rome total war on the battle map. the general giving his speech and the hoplites who attack, the camera that is going from left to right.
the quality of the realease is great if someone is still interested
the story does weaken a bit when they are coming more to the end of the movie. and angelina jolie sucks monkeyballs. but thats propably cause i hate her.
all in all i liked it and i would give 8/10 |
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| Posted: Sun, 6th Feb 2005 23:22 Post subject: |
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In case you didn't realise, alexanders best mate is gay and he's in most of the film. Half of their scenes together are spent looking longingly into each others eyes.
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Ispep
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Posts: 4117
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| Posted: Sun, 6th Feb 2005 23:52 Post subject: |
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Okay, but the relationship is a part of the reality which the film wanted to portray. I agree it's not handled very well, and the fact they are both (fairly) big film stars will detract even further - but it's not my biggest caveat regarding the movie.
Essentially you could pick holes in practically everything - but it's not that bad a film, I'd say it's average overall.
Accents didn't trouble me as I didn't recognise them anyway.
Shame we couldn't have a better film for the story of Alexander though.
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| Posted: Mon, 7th Feb 2005 09:34 Post subject: van you help me |
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i want to download this movie is but i dont know how can you help me
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copywrong
Posts: 707
Location: Here today, gone tomorrow...
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| Posted: Mon, 7th Feb 2005 11:44 Post subject: |
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Sorry dude, no requesting. You are reported.
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fisk
Posts: 9145
Location: Von Oben
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| Posted: Mon, 7th Feb 2005 14:26 Post subject: |
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Here is a review (in swedish) which I totally agree with (it's written by one of my net-buddies):
http://www.bulldozer.nu/avtryck/alexand.html
I'll translate it for you:
It feels like an overpowering task to convey what I feel about Oliver Stones latest splendorous pecoral.
Our language is mayap "glory and heroism" but such a heritage makes you lose some of the good expressions of cynicism, contempt and regular ill will, that maybe would've existed in the "villains and bad guys language".
From the movie "Alexander"
Colin Farell is desperately looking for a way to make the movie even more pecoral in it's tone.
© Warner Bros
Okay, let's be a bit objective, what's so wrong with this so promising mastodont movie?
The pretexts:
I'll blame Mel Gibson, he opened the door for dead languages and here we're sitting and watching texts written in cuneiform. I don't know how it is with the rest of the swedish people, but my archaic babylonian is a tad rusty.
The opening scene:
In an attempt to imitate Orson Welles grand epic - the scene has a touch of "Citizen Kane", a pity that it's totally incomprehensible, and I do not know whether someone is born, or if he's dying. Maybe the moment could've been spoilt by the fact that some idiot hade come up with the idea that you could combine the press release with some promo-party during the cuneiform orgy, instead of, like civilized human beings would've done, arriving before the movie, a couple of free-loading free charge imbicils sat down behind me and started to make a lot of rummaging and rustling noises with their clothing (and paraphernalia).
When they finally had put their loud wardrobe to rest (on a non-intentional clothing place) the two soully underachievers start to pass a large sound enhanced piece of cellophane between the two of them.
I do not know how it is when the rest of the swedish people go to the movies, but in the world I was raised in, you leave the cellophane, rustle rummage bag and your newly purchased glockenspiel at home when you go to the movies.
So to conclude, if I didn't catch on any of the movies first five minutes it was because of that I doggedly tried to concentrate on not becoming convicted of murder.
After the "Citizen Kane" had gone by the movie visitor is given a class in history by Anthony Hopkins himself. Yet again, I cannot look beyond anyone else but me, but if I had anything to say - ten minutes with an old gaga gaffer, who is walking around in front of obvious side-scenes and is pointing on maps with a roll of scripture, been lost. What interest that the cuneiform and "Citizen Alexander" created is now killed, minced, grilled and enjoyed effectively with a glass of retsina by Ptolemaios Lecter and his dry dustiness.
The casting:
Okay, I'll be nice. The casting team has done a magnificent job, with getting celebrities from all Hollywood's corners together. The only demand here seems to be that they should be talking with a funny accent to hide the fact that there isn't a vocal coach in the world that can manage to hide Colin Farells obvious irish refraction. Therefore they have instructed everybody who can to speak scottish or irish. The effect is that you desperately start to wonder why the greeks suddenly sound like hobbits, and find out that you're looking for Pippin. Angelina Jolie could obviously not sound like as if she came from Glasgow so she got the order to sound like a bad pastisch of a romanian gypsy in a Hammer Horror production.
And who came up with the idea to cast Val Kilmer as Philip the one-eyed of Macedonia? I keep thinking about another Oliver Stone-production that he starred in and keep expecting him to burst out in a "I am the Lizard King!" starting to dance like a junkie without a shirt on. It must be the macedonian kings's hippie beard that's giving me flashbacks.
The application:
We are continually thrown hither and forth between the archaic Ptolemeios snuff dry mass in Alexandria and scenes from Alexanders life.
In-between extremely important details from history is thrown together with how Alexander goes from being insulted and cast out of his fathers second wedding to having taken the position as the successor of the murdered king Philip, standing in front of the all important and deciding battle somewhere in far east Asia where he wins the crown of Babylon. Wohoo!
Surely a scene that explains it all back in the end of the movie, but by then you only wish that this shit will end. Some idiot have forgotten to tell Stone that he has spent all playtime he's been given as a director and should only henceforth be allowed to make short movies. So, instead of the interesting thirty minutes of the entire movie we're given three hours of maximum pecorality.
I also get the strong creping emotion that Oliver Stone means the entire movie to be some sort of political contribution in the current world situation with some obscure connection between USA and Alexanders imperium. That doesn't make the movie any better.
Cowardice:
It is hardly a secret that the old greeks had a rather inconservative and unorthodox view of homosexuality. At least the one that took place between men, they probably opressed the female sexuality in whatever form it took, what do I know. That Alexander was more than brotherly in love with his "friend" Hephaiston can hardly surprise anyone (historically educated), yet still I've seen more passionate hugs in "Grabbarna på Fagerhult" (Swedish TV-series that is about as stoic, male-patriarch stereotype you'll ever get.) It's as if Oliver Stone is ashamed over the fact that the greeks were so queer that the village people should've changed the indian for "him in toga" and therefore he's showing the love between the two main characters with manly hugs of chastity and some gazes of wanting. Okay, I'm glad I didn't have to see Colin Farell fudgepacking Jared Leto in a rough light, since there isn't enough cleenex in the world to get that image off the retina, but this sort of hypocrite cowardice in front of the american bible audience pisses me off.
The length:
Did I mention that the movie is nearly three hours imbearably long?
With tons of too long scenes, ridiculous color filters and unbearable cackling from Anthony Hopkins. And one and a few battle scenes (that often are filmed in a way that makes Lars von Trier seem steady at hand). If I had cut this movie, I could've said what this movie has to say in fifteen minues, just by cutting away the scenes where Angelina Jolie is pouting her lips or where Colin Farell fails miserably at making one of Bernard Hills speeches from "Lord of the Rings".
Fact is that I can shorten down this movie into two sentences without losing it's message in entirety.
"Alexander was born, lived and died. He was a hard man who wasn't afraid to hug other guys in a manly and chaste way."
There you have it, send me $5. If you didn't find it worth to se Rosario Dawsons boobs, but then I recommend the DVD-edition, it has a pause function.
Index:
Grand side-scenes
Grand scenes
Grand men
Snakes
Overly legible
Pure and true manly love
Yes, yes I'm back.
Somewhat.
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