I was taking something called Hydrocodone to get rid of the excruciating pain I had in my tooth. The pain meds worked beautifully, but the downside was that I haven't been able to have a nice shit for a few days... since Saturday morning to be exact.
At work sitting at my desk, and I finally felt that rumble in my belly I've been waiting for patiently. I can't say that I've ever been excited to take a shit, but today I was... for once.
This thing....this thing that came out of me was a large solid harpoon shaped monster, that I was completely surprised my body was able to produce; and the smell... oh dear lawd... I'm surprised my asshole didn't need stitches afterwards.
I won't be taking poops for granted any longer, they are the unsung heroes of the bathroom ritual. All hail.
I was a bit worried about pooping after having my appendix removed a year or two ago. You know how you actually make an effort and push it out, well I didn't want to do that in case it put strain on my intestines, so I just kind of waited for it to build up and come out very easily btw, I have no idea why I'm telling you this.
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"Enlightenment is man's emergence from his self-imposed nonage. Nonage is the inability to use one's own understanding without another's guidance. This nonage is self-imposed if its cause lies not in lack of understanding but in indecision and lack of courage to use one's own mind without another's guidance. Dare to know! (Sapere aude.) "Have the courage to use your own understanding," is therefore the motto of the enlightenment."
sar·casm | \ ˈsär-ˌka-zəm \
1: a sharp and often satirical or ironic utterance designed to cut or give pain
2a: a mode of satirical wit depending for its effect on bitter, caustic, and often ironic language that is usually directed against an individual
b: the use or language of sarcasm
Sometimes I don't poop for like 5-6 days when I'm at work (mostly due to me living in a country with no good place to stop and poop by the road, and because I don't eat much when working).
When I finally get home to poop, i poop so much it's like a new niglet is born (I'm pretty sure thats how they're made).
Usually makes me bleed due to size. I kinda like it too.
My exwife after taking codeine for 3 days had one so big it clogged the toilet i shit you not. She was mortified (Women are strange about poop) because i had to deal with the clog. Nasty.
I was in Montana last year and people were standing outside of the washroom, asked whats up. "Did you come for the shop?" I guess a woman took a shit so big people were coming to see it lol. People even fucking took pictures, posted it to facebook. I saw it and it was the biggest shit i have ever seen in my life. If i was the janitor that had to clean that i wouldn't be mad, id be impressed.
MY sister is a Doctor. He quote is " A happy Colon makes a happy person"
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such detail xD
