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 Posted: Sat, 19th Mar 2005 14:23 Post subject: Your favourite Bash.org quotes? |
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<benja> A worldwide survey was conducted by the UN. The only question
asked was:"Would you please give your honest opinion about solutions to the
food shortage in the rest of the world?"
<benja> The survey was a huge failure...
<benja> In Africa they didn't know what "food" meant.
<benja> In Eastern Europe they didn't know what "honest" meant.
<benja> In Western Europe they didn't know what "shortage" meant.
<benja> In China they didn't know what "opinion" meant.
<benja> In the Middle East they didn't know what "solution" meant.
<benja> In South America they didn't know what "please" meant.
<benja> And in the USA they didn't know what "the rest of the world" meant
<molo> C:>ping god
<molo> Ping request could not find host god. Please check the name and try again.
<molo> it's true, god doesn't exist
<mrmin123> maybe he's just having DNS problems
<[56k]holtzboy> who hates metallica's st. anger cd? me me me me me
<cockmonster> geez, 56kers, you even lag in real life
<cockmonster> we all got done bitching about that CD months ago
<Frenchman`> cockmonster, he just finished downloading it
<Eticam> I was in biology class once, and the teacher said there was sugar in sperm
<Eticam> And a girl asked why doesn't it taste sweet then
<Eticam> When she realised what she said her face became red like a spanked monkey ass
<Eticam> Then the teacher said, because you taste sweetness with the front of your tongue, not the part of your tongue back in your throat
<Eticam> The girl started crying and left class ^^
<Quake-Hat> brad, your mom is fine as shit
<Quake-Hat> i think i will masturbate to her while i play with my balls
<bad_brad> brad had to go blow his nose, but thanks for the compliment, i will be calling your mother
<Quake-Hat> Jesus-fucking christ!!!
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<JonJonB> Purely in the interests of science, I have replaced the word "wand" with "wang" in the first Harry Potter Book
<JonJonB> Let's see the results...
<JonJonB> "Why aren't you supposed to do magic?" asked Harry.
<JonJonB> "Oh, well -- I was at Hogwarts meself but I -- er -- got expelled, ter tell yeh the truth. In me third year. They snapped me wang in half an' everything
<JonJonB> A magic wang... this was what Harry had been really looking forward to.
<JonJonB> "Yes, yes. I thought I'd be seeing you soon. Harry Potter." It wasn't a question. "You have your mother's eyes. It seems only yesterday she was in here herself, buying her first wang. Ten and a quarter inches long, swishy, made of willow. Nice wang for charm work."
<JonJonB> "Your father, on the other hand, favored a mahogany wang. Eleven inches. "
<JonJonB> Harry took the wang. He felt a sudden warmth in his fingers. He raised the wang above his head, brought it swishing down through the dusty air and a stream of red and gold sparks shot from the end like a firework, throwing dancing spots of light on to the walls
<JonJonB> "Oh, move over," Hermione snarled. She grabbed Harry's wang, tapped the lock, and whispered, 'Alohomora!"
<JonJonB> The troll couldn't feel Harry hanging there, but even a troll will notice if you stick a long bit of wood up its nose, and Harry's wang had still been in his hand when he'd jumped - it had gone straight up one of the troll's nostrils.
<JonJonB> He bent down and pulled his wang out of the troll's nose. It was covered in what looked like lumpy gray glue.
<JonJonB> He ran onto the field as you fell, waved his wang, and you sort of slowed down before you hit the ground. Then he whirled his wang at the dementors. Shot silver stuff at them.
<JonJonB> Ok
<JonJonB> I have found, definitive proof
<JonJonB> that J.K Rowling is a dirty DIRTY woman, making a fool of us all
<JonJonB> "Yes," Harry said, gripping his wang very tightly, and moving into the middle of the deserted classroom. He tried to keep his mind on flying, but something else kept intruding.... Any second now, he might hear his mother again... but he shouldn't think that, or he would hear her again, and he didn't want to... or did he?
<melusine > O_______O
<JonJonB> Something silver-white, something enormous, erupted from the end of his wang
<JonJonJonB> Then, with a sigh, he raised his wang and prodded the silvery substance with its tip.
<JonJonJonB> 'Get - off - me!' Harry gasped. For a few seconds they struggled, Harry pulling at his uncles sausage-like fingers with his left hand, his right maintaining a firm grip on his raised wang.
-------
These are basically my favs, and yours? Yes, I'm bored. And I feel like laughing.
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| Posted: Sun, 20th Mar 2005 02:14 Post subject: |
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| Posted: Sun, 20th Mar 2005 03:03 Post subject: |
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phew! thought i was a dolt for not getting it! 
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| Posted: Sun, 20th Mar 2005 04:00 Post subject: |
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I don't like bash.org
most of their stuff isn't that funny
they have like 10 funny quotes out of the entire set
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| Posted: Sun, 20th Mar 2005 09:49 Post subject: |
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...www.bash.org. Maybe I should explain, I thought the entire internet knew about it.
It's a site where people record IRC/MSN/Whatever conversations they had, and send the funny ones too...bash.org.
Yay. Now lets start posting, I'm still bored.
And injurious, obviously to you they aren't funny, because you have the power to think up thinks three times better in a flash with your magic wang. -_-
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| Posted: Sun, 20th Mar 2005 14:48 Post subject: |
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| Posted: Tue, 22nd Mar 2005 17:11 Post subject: quotes |
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deelix
PDIP Member
Posts: 32062
Location: Norway
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| Posted: Sat, 4th Sep 2010 18:57 Post subject: |
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"Quantum mechanics is actually, contrary to it's reputation, unbeliveably simple, once you take the physics out."
Scott Aaronson | chiv wrote: | | thats true you know. newton didnt discover gravity. the apple told him about it, and then he killed it. the core was never found. |
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| Posted: Sun, 5th Sep 2010 12:57 Post subject: |
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Wow. I made this thread 5 years ago.
Now there's a blast from the past. I didn't even remember Bash.org.
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deelix
PDIP Member
Posts: 32062
Location: Norway
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| Posted: Sun, 5th Sep 2010 14:59 Post subject: |
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I agree tho, most of the stuff is really not that funny
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| Posted: Sun, 5th Sep 2010 15:22 Post subject: |
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Well there are some funny stuff 
| Quote: | < k5egg> the fucking oil spill is several hundred times larger than AT&T's 3G coverage...
< n1lqj> Unlike AT&T the oil spill is guaranteed to cover everyone |
"Quantum mechanics is actually, contrary to it's reputation, unbeliveably simple, once you take the physics out."
Scott Aaronson | chiv wrote: | | thats true you know. newton didnt discover gravity. the apple told him about it, and then he killed it. the core was never found. |
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Hierofan
Banned
Posts: 3807
Location: Internets
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| Posted: Sun, 5th Sep 2010 15:24 Post subject: |
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eh , this shit reminds me of the good old bloodninja material , still great stuff
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| Posted: Sun, 5th Sep 2010 17:08 Post subject: |
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Bring back Juba?
I thought he was pretty funny at times lol.
Ryzen 5 3600 cpu@3.60 Mhz.
hyper x 32 gb ddr 4 memory.
Msi Carbon gaming pro ac motherboard.
Evga 600 psu.
Msi Armour rx 8 gb 5700 Graphic card.
Ps4 Standard 500gb.
Lg 4k 42 inch tv.
Oculus Quest 2.
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| Posted: Sun, 5th Sep 2010 18:18 Post subject: |
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| Theescapist wrote: | Bring back Juba?
I thought he was pretty funny at times lol. |
He never left
"Quantum mechanics is actually, contrary to it's reputation, unbeliveably simple, once you take the physics out."
Scott Aaronson | chiv wrote: | | thats true you know. newton didnt discover gravity. the apple told him about it, and then he killed it. the core was never found. |
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only from the top lists... i don't want to run through 300+ pages just find one more 
