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werdercanuck
Posts: 1562
Location: Pot Capital of Canada (BC)
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 Posted: Thu, 22nd Sep 2005 01:38 Post subject: Fun with the Pizza company... |
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Did you ever order a pizza that tasted like a big turd, or they even brought you the wrong one? Here are some points to get revenge:
1. Use a phone with tone-dial and press random numbers as you order and ask the person on the other line to stop it.
2. Think of a fake credit card name and ask if they accept it.
3. Use abbreviations that are common in amateur radio
4. Order a Maxi-Big-Mac-Menu
5. End the the order with "And remember, this conversation never happened!"
6. Tell the person on the other line that you have another pizza delivery company on the other line and you will take the better deal.
7. Only tell him your address, say "just surprise me..." and hang up.
8. Answer every question with a counterquestion.
9. Dont enunciate every name, spell them.
10. Stotter every "P".
11. Ask the person on the other line what he/she is wearing.
12. Say "Hello?" wait 5 seconds and pretend as if they called you.
13. Order your pizza very quickly without taking one breath, if they asked for any drink freak out and become unoriented.
14. Tell the person on the other line that you are depressive and he/she should cheer you up.
15. Speak every couple of seconds with a different accent.
16. Order 52 slices of pepperoni, which they should place by a fractal formula which you will tell them. Ask if they need a piece of paper.
17. Pretend you know the person from the other line. Say 'from the gay club right?"
18. Start with "I would like..." a little later change your mind and say "No, I'd rather not..."
19. If he/she repeats your order, say "Ok, this will be xx, please drive to the next window.
20. Rent a pizza.
21. Order while you have an electric razor running next to the receiver.
22. Ask if you can keep the pizzabox, and when they say 'yes' let out a loud sigh of relief.
23. Emphasise the last syllable of "pepperoni". Speak with a very long "I".
24. Order your pizza "shaken" not "stirred"
25. Ask "Are you sure this is (Company you're calling)?". If they say it is, answer with "Well, you have to prove that somehow". If they do, start to cry and say "Can you imagine how it is to be lied to?"
26. Ask if the pizza is really dead.
27. Imitate the voice of the person on the other line.
28. While you order, leave out a few verbs.
29. Call to complain about the service and hang up. Call back a few minutes later and apologize and say that you are drunk.
30. Play on a guitar while you order.
31. Surprise the person on the other line with less known fakts about folk music.
32. Ask for the complete menu.
33. Quote Shakespeare.
34. Ask what pizza is best for a glas of Chardonnay.
35. Bark into the receiver, then yell at your imaginary dog to cut it out.
36. Dont order a whole pizza, just a quarter.
37. Create a psychoanalysis of the person on the other line.
38. Ask for their phone number, hang up and call again and ask the same question. Repeat as often as you want.
39. Order two different toppings, then say "No, they will start to fight each other..."
40. Ask for the person who took your order the last time.
41. Ask yourself loud, if you should cut your vibrissae.
42. Try to order while you drink.
43. Start the conversation with "My call to (Company), Scene 1, cut and ...ACTION!"
44. Ask if the pizza is organic.
45. Ask for pizza-maintenance and repair.
46. Use tone-dial and hit every few seconds 9-1-1.
47. Say to yourself "I wonder what this phone key is for..." and pretend the phone line got disconnected.
48. Start the conversation with todays date and say "This could be the last entry..."
49. Hiss "kshhhhhhhhhhhh" into the receiver and ask if he/she felt it.
50. Feel out the psyche of the person and use it to your advantage.
51. Give your toppings names of other pizzas.
52. Suspend your order every now now and then and play on your harmonica.
53. Put the call on hold with music.
54. Give the person a secret code and use it every time you order.
55. Order as the first topping field mushroom. After the order is complete and he/she repeated it say "But without mushrooms, please" and hang up.
56. When he/she repeats your order, change a few things. Repeat. At the third time say "You dont get do you?"
57. When they give you the price, say "Oh that sounds complicated. I hate maths!"
58. Order a one inch pizza.
59. Order a pizza with tuna and ask how many dolphins had to die for the pizza.
60. Dont say the word "pizza"!. When the person says it tell him "Please dont say that word!"
61. When you order, play a movie with a high speed chase in the background. Yell "OWWWWWW" every time they shoot.
62. Write down the name of the person. Later, on every hour call and say "This is your xx o'clock wake up call (name). Have a nice day!" and hang up.
63. Start to bargain.
64. Crack your fingers into the receiver.
65. When he/she says "Can I take your order?" say "Huh, do you mean right NOW?"
66. During the conversation, take the reveiver further and further away from your mouth, at the and scream as loud as you can "BYEEEEEEEEEE"
67. Say that you will pay when your agent calls you back.
68. During the conversation, pretend you fall asleep, after a while wake up and say "Huh? Where am I? Who are YOU?"
69. Say with a very deep voice "Stop giving me crap about nutritions, just tell me if you have something exotic..."
70. Demand the dough on the top.
71. Scream "Crazy oventhings!"
72. Ask for a pizza than only another pizza company offers (f.e.Pizza Hut)
73. Make a list of very exotic food and order them as topping (f.e. Sushi)
74. Tell the person that it is your wedding anniversary and you would appreciate it if the pizza delivery guy could hide behing the couch and jump up when your hubby/wife comes home.
75. Tell the person, to tell his/her supervisor that his/her boss is fired.
76. Confess to your sins.
77. When the person suggests something, say with a soft voice "I shall not be tempted by the sweet sound of your voice..."
78. Be very imprecise with your order.
79. When the person repeats your order say "One more time please, but this time with more "Ooooooooohhhhh!"
80. Place your order and say "I wont go further with you in this relationship!"
81. Ask the person if he/she knows the term "beat up the pizza". If not, explaim how to do it and demand that they will do it to your pizza.
82. Ask if they want to put your order on the menu and suggest a fair deal.
83. Immitate the voice of a celebrity and during your order say to yourself that you dont have to take shit from a pimple faced geek.
84. Ask if they offer life insurance during the duration of your dining.
85. When the person asks "Is that all?", giggle and say "Well, we will see about that won't we?"
86. During the conversation, pretend that puberty just hit you, break your voice and act very excited.
87. Engage yourself into a profound interchange of ideas.
88. When the person offers you additional things to your order, ask why he/she has to punish you so badly.
89. Ask if the pizza's shots are up to date.
90. Order a stew or cooked pizza.
91. Demand the delivery guy from last time. Reason it with "He/she is the best in tap-dancing/dancing/stripping/yodeling/vacuum/etc.
92. Tell the person that you are allergic to cheese and tomatoes, and ask what pizza he can recommend.
93. Repeat THE WHOLE TIME EVERYTHING the other person says, keep up until he/she hangs up annoyed. Call again and say "Oh we got disconnected.." and repeat.
94. Ask how many calories a pizza has, cry out loud and say to yourself "I'm too fat, I'm too fat...", demand a pizza under 200 calories.
95. Yell at the other person to stop these perverted things.
96. Say say every every single single word word twice twice.
97. During the conversation, start to giggle and ask if he hears these voices too.
98. Flush the toilet a few times during the conversation.
99. Don't say anything, just crackle a plastic bag and whistle quietly.
100. Act terrified when you hear the voice of the other person, and absolutely insist that you saw a shadow in his/her future.
Have fun
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| Posted: Fri, 23rd Sep 2005 00:12 Post subject: |
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ahh too much.... but my favorite is ''26. Ask if the pizza is really dead''
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| Posted: Fri, 23rd Sep 2005 12:22 Post subject: |
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Last edited by Yondaime on Mon, 2nd Dec 2024 16:09; edited 1 time in total
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deelix
PDIP Member
Posts: 32062
Location: Norway
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manwithplanxyz
Posts: 1009
Location: Somewhere in the past looking for the future
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| Posted: Sat, 14th Jan 2006 20:57 Post subject: |
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| deelix wrote: | | throatbleed wrote: | wasn't funny  |
yes it was |
| Clevesa wrote: | | Murder is the best way out of this that I see. |
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| Posted: Sat, 14th Jan 2006 21:05 Post subject: |
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| deelix wrote: | | throatbleed wrote: | | wasn't funny |
yes it was |
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| Posted: Sun, 15th Jan 2006 23:32 Post subject: |
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| throatbleed wrote: | | wasn't funny |
you work at some pizza place dont you? 
here in holland we are cheap and call the "kindertelefoon" it's free  |
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