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zmed




Posts: 9234
Location: Orbanistan
PostPosted: Wed, 19th Mar 2014 22:10    Post subject: Chick Tracts
These things...

I had a few of these from the US, and never occurred to me to open a thread for them until now. Well, your suffering is at an end! Laughing

A little background: Jack Chick is an evangelical, ultra-fundie comic book artist. He makes these pocket sized, 15-20 pages long little booklets that have stories about how certain things are evil and how Jebus is your only and solitary hope for having anything good in your life. They are WIDELY distributed, pretty much every fundamentalist churches in the US have a truckload of them ready to give out, and they can be found all over the world, but not as prevalent as they are in the US.

These pamphlets are a wonderful window into the mindset of the zealous fundamentalists in the southern United States. They portray a world where witches and demons are real and they are really out to get little Billy "GoodChtistian" Smith. It's simply fascinating, proper cavemen stuff. Laughing

They are all available at his site: http://www.chick.com/catalog/tractlist.asp

Here's one of the more infamous tracts about Dungeons and Dragons. Read it and remember that these people are convinced that the game really operates like this. Very Happy











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Sellob




Posts: 1229
PostPosted: Wed, 19th Mar 2014 22:16    Post subject:
wat
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zmed




Posts: 9234
Location: Orbanistan
PostPosted: Wed, 19th Mar 2014 22:27    Post subject:
Sellob wrote:
wat
Exactly. Very Happy


Don't forget children, witches are out to get your soul! grinhurt And the Catholic church is of the devil because they are not real Xtians.











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StrEagle




Posts: 14059
Location: Balkans
PostPosted: Thu, 20th Mar 2014 02:33    Post subject:

Lutzifer wrote:
and yes, mine is only average
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zmed




Posts: 9234
Location: Orbanistan
PostPosted: Thu, 20th Mar 2014 11:47    Post subject:
StrEagle wrote:
Precisely. Very Happy

Just keep in mind that these comics are found in 99% of churches in the southern US, with tons of them ready to be given away. They are routinely found in the home of every American, since they are given away like candy (sometimes literally, given to kids on Haloween instead of candy, because it's Satan's birthday and they have to save their little souls! Razz ).

Also, irony is entirely lost on these people. Every other religion is false, and here's why, but accept mine with blind faith and don't look too closely, or Skydaddy will punish you for not having faith! lol wut

Quite hilarious just how easily the Muslim guy is won over.

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VGAdeadcafe




Posts: 22230
Location: ★ ಠ_ಠ ★
PostPosted: Thu, 20th Mar 2014 15:26    Post subject:
I like how they use Bible references. As if it's to cross-reference these ... facts Laughing
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zmed




Posts: 9234
Location: Orbanistan
PostPosted: Sat, 22nd Mar 2014 16:41    Post subject:
In honor of Hercules going off the deep end, here's the urban legend that he's desperately trying to make a whole movie out of.











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RatKing




Posts: 1212
Location: Nondescript cave in the land of the polar bears, Finland
PostPosted: Sat, 22nd Mar 2014 17:32    Post subject:
These comics gave my cancer cancer.

But they're funny as hell once you get over the point someone actually thinks this way.
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zmed




Posts: 9234
Location: Orbanistan
PostPosted: Mon, 24th Mar 2014 12:52    Post subject:
Don't forget children! In just a few years, Christianity will be outlawed, kids in school will be taught how to sacrifice animals to Satan, and new-age healers dressed as supervillains will drag believers in the One True Faith™ to concentration camps to be tortured and executed. Laughing

Oh...and you'll have to wear kid sized nazi uniforms to school, because reasons.











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RatKing




Posts: 1212
Location: Nondescript cave in the land of the polar bears, Finland
PostPosted: Mon, 24th Mar 2014 15:06    Post subject:
Oh Lawd, I've seen the light!

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xxax
Banned



Posts: 2610
PostPosted: Mon, 24th Mar 2014 16:08    Post subject:
Why do these guys so want to be scientifically right? Its obvious that science will never (or at least for quite some time) be able to totally disprove god, so why do they need this conformation that they are right? I think most of them aren't religious at all since if they would be, i think this wouldn't bother them in the slightest.
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zmed




Posts: 9234
Location: Orbanistan
PostPosted: Tue, 25th Mar 2014 02:12    Post subject:
Ok, this is without sarcastic introductions. One of the most vile piece this fucktard ever created. And as a bonus, it also highlights the immorality of the whole worldview.

First, Skydady allows 3 children to die. And in the minds of these assholes, they will be burning for eternity because they weren't saved. Oh, but there is light at the end of the tunnel folks! By killing off the three children God managed to make their mom, who was the source of suffering for who knows how many people, get saved and she will go to heaven. Isn't it wonderful? Three children died and went to hell, just so a miserable redneck can find Jebus. Because even Hitler can go to heaven, as long as he accepted The Lord™ into his heart before painting his bunker's wall pink.

Ok, that was more sarcastic than I planned. Razz Kinda hard not ridicule these ideas when they are so transparently fucked up and immoral.











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zmed




Posts: 9234
Location: Orbanistan
PostPosted: Mon, 31st Mar 2014 21:22    Post subject:
In honor of the movie about the same legend, here's Jackie's take on the flood. Got to give it to the guy, at least he has the gut to show a baby about to be drowned by his skydaddy. Very Happy He's not one of those love-dovey xtians, who teach the coloring book version of the story. This is the old testament, bitch. Laughing

Oh, and of course those evil atheistic communists hushed the whole discovering-the-ark thing up.

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zmed




Posts: 9234
Location: Orbanistan
PostPosted: Fri, 11th Apr 2014 01:27    Post subject:
In the world of Jack's imagination, gays are all violent extremists who beat up street-preachers, every Xtian who teaches tolerance and understanding are misled by homo-demons, and the Xtians who preach hell and damnation are just concerned about their fellow men (limiting rights and treating LGBT people as sub-human is just a misrepresentation of their message of love, obviously Razz ). Oh, and the government is naturally conducting a which-hunt against them. Laughing






Now just remember that these kinds of tracts are handed out freely and in huge numbers in the vast majority of churches all across the southern US. No wonder they are such a ass-backwards cesspool of religious superstitions and bigotry.
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